Book Review by Jack Falt, INFJ
What I found very valuable in the book was that she clearly defined how being in the grip was different from using our inferior function as part of our everyday living. The key is stress. To be fully functioning human beings, we have to learn to use all of our eight function (both introverted and extraverted versions of the basic four). We may not be all that skilled at using them, but we usually can get by if we can go at our own pace. However, when stress is piled on, we often go into the grip using our inferior function. Since the inferior function is mostly unconscious, our behaviour can be at quite out of character. Hence the title: Was That Really Me? The main addition to this book is how chronic stress is more and more a part of our daily lives. Today the majority of us are living under intense pressure that is there all the time. In the end this can result in burnout.
The book begins with basic Jung-Myers concepts and then moves on to type dynamics. Even though this is a mandatory beginning for any Jung-Myers book, there were several new and useful ideas. One was a chart that lists the eight preferences and gives three words describing the preference in its adaptive form (positive) and then in its one-sided form (negative). Since the MBTI® instrument measures normal behaviour rather than pathological behaviour, descriptions of being in the grip are one of the few place where negative behaviour of ordinary people are given. Being in the grip is just part of normal everyday behaviour. If we can identify it and know its cause, we can reduce the intensity and frequency of these outbursts.
Following the introductory chapters, there are eight chapters, one for each attitude of the four functions with both of the possible auxiliaries described. They looks at the kinds of situations that are likely stressors and the usual way people will respond. Type dynamics will give the likely form of the grip experience, but life circumstances will provide the content of the grip experience. This is the Shadow, the unconscious content. Jung saw the shadow buried in the unconscious. The grip experience actually serves a useful purpose in bringing unresolved issues to the surface where they must be dealt with.
The book finishes off with some examples of how married couples, parents and children, employer and employees, and coworkers are triggered into having grip experiences, and how they can deal with them.
This book is very worthwhile even if just you read the introductory chapters, the final chapter, and then read the one chapter describing your own type. This book is certainly one that should be on every therapist’s book shelf.
One criticism I have of the book is that it is quite a long book (close to 350 Pages). Couldn’t we have had a few cartoons? In the grip experiences are regular fare in most cartoons. There are lots of them around.